A Bright Song About Beer

You thought, mistakenly, I was enamoured
By those entrancing eyelashes that fluttered
Because I quickly shut my eyes and stuttered,
But actually, I bit my lip and stammered
Because I’d had four beers and I was hammered.
Thinking you knew which side of the bread was buttered,
You watched the tallow candle as it guttered,
And when I fell asleep you rose and clamoured.

But that was good: the tallow is too cheap;
The smell of ale, not everyone’s delight,
Hides that. I may have been a little tight,
But I’m okay: the ale puts me to sleep.
In fact I have no promises to keep,
Just more beer in the fridge for us tonight.